Punching Bag Punching Back

The revenge of the punching bag

It's just a guess but I do have the impression that some times punching backs, focus mitts, pads and similar martial arts related tools get's one hit too many and decides to strike back. At least you can't blame them if they snaps one day and decides that enough is enough...

The clip below is a good example of how things can turn out less elegant than the martial arts enthusiast have envisioned. It gets particularly funny when you see all the well rehearsed preparation that goes into the punch and how well placed the counter strike is.

Another punching fail for the history books. How I love the fighting arts and the internet shenanigans! :-)

Showing Off Taekwondo Fail

Deputy flashing martial arts skills

There are places where, and times and when it is absolutely OK, perhaps even quite nice to show some of your fancy martial arts techniques and elaborate skills that you have worked so hard for.

Then there are those situations when said display of awesomeness will bring you nothing but ridicule or even heaps of trouble...

While a brief display can be totally fine as long as it's for a good cause, it's being asked for and you don't hurt, insult or enrage someone. One example is the recent TV debate, when Swedish Prime Minister Candidate Stefan Löfven was asked to show a few jujutsu tricks after the debate was over. Totally lighthearted and kosher.

Also a prearranged demo, say for instance to market your art or martial arts school or as a part of a community fair is of course totally fine. It's been cleared beforehand in those cases.

When showing off is not OK

There are, as previously stated, times when flashing your kicks and punches - or indeed grappling skills - will land you in trouble faster than you can say 'peak-a-poo'.

A Denver Sheriff's deputy recently discovered the effect of performing his taekwondo kicks to the wrong audience when he - as well as his colleagues - ended up having to control a jail inmate.

I'm pretty sure the martial arts nitwit is a nice guy and that he has great kicks and all that. But seriously... Showing off in an environment like that? In law enforcement and security line of work The brain is designed to be used, that's all I can say really.

Muay Thai Fight Humor

This is definitely not a martial arts fail!

Some might probably tag this clip as martial arts fail, to me that would be a huge mistake. Personally, I would take an opposing view and argue that we are looking at full-blown martial arts win here - great martial arts humor as well as action (although probably not the best of fighting skills...).

This could probably have been set up as some sort of slap stick arranged type of fight. However, you can see that these guys are really going for knocking each other out ... as well as the referee it seems :-)

A Real Life Martial Arts Nutcase

A kung fu killer as bad as they come

This mad and bogus kung fu master from Spain have been described as "manipulative and selfish", an arrogant person who ran his gym like a sect.

While I have met a few in the martial arts community who could probably be described as having a few of these personal traits, I have never ever encountered someone who also woul be described as a cold blooded serial killer, a martial arts maniac who "enjoyed having sadistic sexual relations with defenseless women, beating them and then taking photographs."

I suppose it's safe to say we are looking at a real f-ed up individual here, someone we luckily don't come across every day.

The dangerous weirdo is now on trial for murdering two women in 2013 and it is suspected that he may be guilty in other similar crimes as well.

Police say that they discovered photographs of a naked woman who had been bound and blindfolded standing in front of the body of the man. Initially, the police believed that he might have murdered other women.

A real nutcase, murderer and bogus kung fu master

A Taste of Mixed-Up Martial Arts

Dive in for a taste of mixed-up martial arts!

Ah, the sweet smell of success and victory; the bitter taste of defeat; the strange taste of ... something completely different.

Some say defeat and submission is not an option, I say bull! Sometimes that is absolutely the best choice in crappling.

Kung Fu Inspired Swallowing

Start small with kung fu inspired swallowing!

In our 'Blast from the past' series of martial arts shenanigans we have come to one of the absolute best of the lot. And first off, I have to say this out loud: "I love any serious martial arts nutcase!" There, I said it, had to get it off my chest.

Anywho... It seems this Chinese wanna-be kung-fuka was so impressed with the feats of kung fu sword swallowers that he decided to follow suit.

As any smart (?) kung-fuka in training would do, he started out small - swallowing smaller items like nail clippers, nails and stuff. Only thing is - he didn't consider taking the items out after swallowing them. It should perhaps ring a bell that you would be very surprised if you were to find any real sword swallower leaving the sword there permanently...

Over a period of a month, the nut-job was able to gather quite a cargo of metal in his stomach - a cargo that finally led to massive pains and an admission to hospital. It reportedly took surgeons several hours to remove the rusted metal items from his stomach.

Reports said the nitwit was looking for work as a stuntman after the unfortunate affair. "I think I've proved that I'm tough and willing to do anything," the man allegedly told reporters. Truer words have probably never been spoken :-)

Kung fu inspired swallowing of swords - Image from Flickr.com

From Karate to Run-Fu

Awesome display of Chic-Ken-Do!

It's pretty obvious this karate kid was a bit too confident about his karotty abilities and that he was in for a surprise when the feathered opponent of his decided to give him a taste of the far superior art of chick-ken-do.

The young karate fighter did the only right move given the change of events when he opted for a hasty run-fu tactic. Some times a retreat is the best way forward...

Toe-Kwan-Do

'Toetally' new art: toe-kwan-do

Here's the fresh and little known art of Toe Kwan Do (some times incorrectly spelled Toe Kwon Do). The art is similar to the better known taekwondo but it differs in one major area.

In toe kwan do you get points for taking spectacular hits, and the front face block (shown here) evidently gives you an immediate victory. It may also give you an immediate visit to the emergency room ... but that's considered more like a minor nuisance and something to be reckoned with in this full contact martial art.

A Kung Fu Cut Below the Rest

When master says cut, you cut!

Just revisited this strange and weird kung fu story from China back in late 2010. And when I say weird, I mean really out there, like in totally martial arts maniac approved type of weirdness.

It's about this 60-year-old Chinese man who deliberately cut off his wiener - thus the 'kung fu cut below the rest' title.

And why in the name of Buddha did he even consider this to be a good idea in the first place - saying goodbye to his trouser dragon, chopping off his chopper so to speak? A, glad you asked... Well, here's why.

It appears his sifu (master) came to him in a dream, telling him that he had to get rid of the fun stick in order to advance the chosen martial art - apparently some type of qi gong. Waking up the next morning he did as any good (but somewhat gullible) martial arts student would do - exactly as told by the master...

Chop 'til you drop, master says - Image from Flickr.com

Wanna-Be Martial Artists Fail

Total martial arts shenanigans

Kind of crazy how some folks manage to fall down the stairs after a stupid kick. What is even crazier is that the same individuals post their martial arts to video sharing sites for the whole world to see...

Yes, I admit it - I definitely do stupid martial arts related things myself. However, I don't have the habit of posting it online ... guess that makes me a coward. Could possibly also indicate I have friends that want to spare me the humiliation.

Ninja in Training, Not a Thief

Young Swedish ninja enthusiast in action

Sweden -- Seeing a black clad figure jumping from the next-door balcony, a worried Stockholm resident recently called police about a possible break-in at his neighbor's home.

When police soon after arrived on the scene, they found no sign of a break in. However, they did find a young ninja in training, mid practice. The balcony leap was allegedly some sort of advanced ninja training. 

The homeowner's son had apparently jumping and doing other acrobatic tricks, like scaling walls - clad in full ninja attire of course - as a part of his regular practice routines.

Here's how it get's interesting for sure: A police spokeswomen noted that they were accustomed to such odd operations, and that she "didn't even raise an eyebrow".

"Exciting day on the job - and what a great outfit!" the police reportedly wrote on their Facebook page after the incident.

All wanna-be ninja out there: It appears Stockholm, Sweden is the place to go (at least somewhat) ninjackass if that's something which might tickle your fancy!

Ninja in training, workout - Image from Flickr.com

Karate Expert Facing Machete

Karate expert claims not enough

In this case from March 2011, you can easily see why claiming to have lethal skills in the art of karate is one thing. Properly taking care of someone going after you with a machete is another thing all together.

In any case, sunstar.com.ph had an article about a 31-year-old man who - under the influence of alcohol (of course) - challenged a village neighbor to a fight in in the Philippines.

The nut-case claimed he was a karate expert and a "blackbelter". The neighbor apparently didn't fancy a regular fist fight. Rather, he got hold of a machete and hacked the karate nutcase to death.

Personally, I am pretty certain I'd drop any fancy pants kung fu attempts and rather go for a hasty 'run fu' if someone pulled a weapon like that on me.

Martial arts expert claims not always enough - image from Flickr.com

Sleazy Ninja

A sleazy ninja priest with killer tools

Small wonder ninjas are considered king of awesome by all registered and legitimate martial arts maniacs when you can revel in destructive behavior as seen in this video.

I mean, flame-throwing sai, smoke bombs, throwing stars, concealed ball and chain ... and the sound effects? Martial arts antics can't possibly get any better and further out than this. No way Jose!

Slapkido

Forget the regular bullshido, it's time for slapkido!

Yes boys and girls, you've obviously been lied to. You've probably been taught that you need to punch and kick properly, that it's vital to have a good, solid base/stance and all that jazz?

Well, here's a revelation for you - you don't need proper body mechanics at all. It's just as effective - probably lots more effective - reverting to you childhood slapping and running around like you're possessed by evil martial arts spirits on amphetamine.

Seems the Slap Happy Ninja wasn't far off after all! Or could it be that it's just another martial arts fail...? Please say it ain't so! :-)

Singing Karate Nutcase

Bad singing and really bad karate (blast from the past)

Back in October of 2012 sundayworld.co.za had an article about a journalist and karateka who did not take too lightly on a female colleague teasing him on his singing at work.

The hot headed - and dear we say, excessively heavy handed - vocal "performer" reportedly went ballistic, threw the woman to the floor, kicking and stomped her while screaming: "You are taking me for granted! You are taking me for granted!"

For sure, this is a karate nutcase firing on all cylinders. However, we can't obviously have people criticizing our heartfelt  singing without any form of repercussion (some minor, hands on "attitude adjustment"), now can we?

Bad singing, worse karate - image from Flickr.com

MMA Backflip Flop

A serious backlip fail, MMA style

Man, this MMA backflip fail sure has got to hurt, like a lot. Still, when martial arts antics like this one comes along, you really have to struggle not to laugh.

And dang, these mixed martial arts fighters are tough! When their opponents don't manage to do enough damage, they simply finish the job themselves. Now that's the kind of full on attitude and sportsmanship that marks a true martial arts maniac!

A martial arts fail hardly gets any better than this - a " flying reverse face-plant" after trying way too hard to impress. Dude, I'm impressed!

Mixed-Up Martial Arts #1

Aikido apparently a part of MMA

Yes boys and girls, we obviously got it all wrong ... totally bass ackwards. Not only is aikido hot stuff when it comes to self-defense (actually THE best form of self-defense), it is even an integral part of mixed martial arts (MMA) - aikido-you-not.

I really wonder why some folks seems to keep important secrets like this to themselves. This is so revolutionary and groundbreaking that it has to be heard all over the world!

The best self-defense "on" the world!

Here's what timesofindia.indiatimes.com had to say about the subject back in January 2013:

According to (...), a 15-day basic camp is enough for a woman to defend herself against one or two male members, and a three-month course would make her an expert.
According to (...), aikido or mixed martial arts is the best form of self-defense and is generally taught to commandos of special forces.
(...) of Association of Mixed Martial Arts India said, "aikido is an effective self-defense technique that focuses on dislocation of joints and nerve points. On mixed martial arts, Varma said that it was a combination of several martial arts such as Judo, Aikido, Muay Thai and Karate.

Dang; these akidoki guys really have to be good - an expert in three months... Beam me up Scotty, I definitely need this!

And who would have thought aikido is actually a self defense technique? Silly me, I kind of believed it was a martial art. OK then, I'm Grasshopper and it's back to the drawing board :-)

Aikido, apparently a part of MMA - image from Flickr.com

In case you wonder, we do in fact include a "blast from the past now and then". Really interesting martial arts brain-farts and over the top martial arts antics never goes out of style.

Slap Happy Ninja

Some weird ninja slapping going on

It's definitely legitimate to ask a question about what the heck is going on here. It's supposedly some sort of crazy ninja-style martial arts antics, that much is for certain.

I really do have to wonder if this is a spoof or for real. I am really worried it is for real though and that these ninjazzers actually believe they are learning how to punch effectively. Scary thought...

Taekwondo Olympian With a Bad Idea

Worse than a bad idea - it's plain crazy

UK -- When you go around informing others, verbally as well as in writing, that a named individual is a pedophile, you'd better be darned sure there's hold in those accusations.

Being proven wrong, this 44-year-old taekwondo instructor and Olympian is supposed to have said it was in hindsight "not a good idea" and that she was hot-headed... Not a good idea? It's a totally crazy idea only a very stupid individual could come up with to begin with.

Having had an apparent feud with the person being wrongfully accused is really not an excuse for coming forward as a complete martial arts maniac with a brain on vacation. Some times it's a good idea to stop for a while and take a few deep breaths, perhaps even reflecting on the values and philosophies of martial arts.

As a result of the false claims, the man who was accused was allegedly assaulted and beaten by vigilante, out to "seek justice".

It may indeed be as one of the comments says in the original article that it is strange the accuser hasn't been jailed and that "only a woman could get away with this". What do you think?

Taekwondo Olympian With a Bad Idea - image from dailymail.co.uk

Taekwondo Black Belt Benefit Cheat

A taekwondo black belt benefit cheat from the UK

Being fit enough to do taekwondo on a high level, competing and going for you second dan black belt is a wonderful thing, no doubt about it.

It is when you combine this regular, and very physical, martial arts training with claiming disability benefits from the government that you sooner or later will have some rather serious explaining to do. Just like in this case involving a 40-year-old, British mother.

Taekwondo black belt benefit cheat - image from telegraph.co.uk